So a guy I know recently started a fairly sophisticated marijuana grow operation; said guy is not a close friend of mine; we do not "hang out" or otherwise regularly associate...but we did...in a certain sense, "come up together" in the local Houston surfing scene and what not, having been acquainted for well nigh 25 years now, if but loosely.
And, by the way, I learned this recent bit of tripe second hand and from another such acquaintance.
And frankly, I find this sort of surprising in it's own right since he's a family guy, has a wife and children and what not ... and is generally an upstanding citizen most days; which is to say that it's a little surprising that he'd be willing to risk all of that by becoming a mass grower of hydroponic weed.
But hey, to each his own.
Anyway, what cocks my eyebrow (good word, "cock") is the fact that he's a long time best bud of one of the fellows/families that I highly suspect as having been involved as informants to the investigation of myself over the past six years or so (hey, like it or not you simple fucks, some of your own people have talked).
Also, I'm interested in this peculiar bit of new information because I've known that supposed drug use (major drug use) has been a shiny little nugget on the wish list of the investigators in so far as some day creating the impression of my being the sort of person who "really needs help" (oh, you know, 90 days of court mandated observation, a month or two in some sort of ghey ass "recovery" ward, etc; use your imagination.)
I'm not much of a pot smoker, btw. I certainly was in the very, very distant past ... daily, even ... morning noon and night in my late twenties ... and, especially when I was employed as a work-from-home software designer. It just worked with the solitary nature of that profession and as well, the other artistic (musical and otherwise) projects I was involved in. It was fun ; I enjoyed it. But, that was a long time ago.
In fact, up until about four months ago, I hadn't partaken of "The Weed" for well over 8 years or more. I was actually somewhat fanatically vocal about it on my regular website for quite a few years as I knew it was one of the main "leverage lies" that the investigators wanted to use against me in so far as getting the proverbial ball rolling towards some sort of isolated environment (recovery, etc.) within which they could, er, "explore" until their hearts were content (which would be never, btw cause they are simply wrong about everything they so desperately desire me to be/represent and so the proper phrase would be so that they could, er, "manufacture" until their hearts content; but, that's certainly for another blog).
But back to four months ago.
Yes, it's true ... four months or so ago, I let my brother (who is a daily user of The Weed(tm)) "smoke me out" (as they say) before we saw a movie. I don't like the illegality of The Weed(tm), but I admit it, I find it quite the nice diversion and far away less physically damaging than is say, alcohol. So yeah, I burned with him and it was awesome. That said, refer to my main website jbhfile.com to read about my current and official standing regarding such activities (association with The Weed(tm). But loosely said, I'm certainly not a regular purchaser of such contraband and nor shall I be. The little experiment with my sibling 4 months back was just that ... an experiment ... the satisfying of personal curiosity regarding something I'd not taken part in for a very very long time. And, as mentioned, it was certainly a hoot!
But continuing...
Shortly after the harmless little "soiree" with my brother is when I heard "thru the grapevine" that this particular above mentioned old friend had suddenly started a rather professional and elaborate hydroponic, marijuana grow operation. Furthermore, the other friend who I mentioned, who has been an informant to the investigation over the years, suddenly started having some free samples that he *really* wanted to give me ("for the road" and all). LOL. Seriously, there at the beginning of my knowledge of these things, old informant friend seemed to always have a bit laying around that he wanted me to "try out," etc. I mostly declined ... and totally declined once I smelled the proverbial rat.
So what does this have to do with jbhfile.com and my personal efforts to prove an investigation of myself has existed for well nigh 20 years now?
Well, let me surmise, wont you?
Isolated environment for poking and prodding
The first and most obvious "red flag," if you will is that, as with many years ago, the iatrogenic quacks behind the investigation still desperately would like to relegate me to some sort of isolated environment for poking and prodding and the manufacturing of what the quacks would end up calling "classic elements of the existing profile." You pick the particular flavor of psycho-idiotic cliche': "over sexualization as a youth resulting in adult promiscuity and a hyper developed, yet unconscious sense of sexual aggressiveness, forwardness or neediness as an adult" ... or ... "molested as a child and therefore this recent internet activity is really concerning because all of us Idiot Psychiatrists(tm) know beyond a doubt that 9 out of 10 molestation victims are likely to molest children themselves as an adult" ... (oh! Much biting of nails and gnashing of teeth!) ... or ... "this is why he was looking at those 18 - 25 year old girls on porn sites! He's unconsciously drawn to adolescent or near adolescent women because he's a classic case of the 40 something male longing to hold on to his youth!" ... (oooooh the danger in that!) ... or ... "clearly a narcissistic personality who needs constant validation from the opposite sex and therefore this is why he chooses to jog with his shirt off or wear revealing clothing, etc." .... (Aiiii! The shame in that!!!) ... but I will digress because it's old news at this point.
So yeah ... obviously, being associated with such an illicit substance as The Weed(tm) could indeed act as a very convenient springboard into some sort of court mandated, extended stay at this crazy house or that. And the important point here is the removal of free will ... to create a legal situation wherein I have no recourse but to follow orders or otherwise suffer the very likely consequence of further compounding my situation (or lengthening my stay, if you will).
Surveillance, Surveillance, Surveillance
One salient point to this whole little decade long debacle is the fact that if *any* surveillance of myself is *ever* displayed in a *public* venue, then I will have, in essence, succeeded in proving a long winded and (for the most part) politically motivated investigation of myself exists ... and here ... most importantly, an investigation related to the sorts of topics I've been harping on for the past ten years in my various writings (jbhfile.com, etc.).
It's that simple.
And knowing that the idiots behind the corrupt and violent assault on myself intend to never publicly own that an investigation has existed (since that would then shed a more credible light on some of my other claims like being covertly overdosed on PCP, etc.), then that in turn gives me the opportunity to fuck with the surveillance guys as much as I like ... at least as a simple/gross attempt at creating such bothersome content that they might someday hold it against me publicly ... at which point, (at least as I imagine it to unfold in my fantastic imagination) I might be able to then say to everybody who has been calling me crazy, "TOLD YOU SO!".
So regarding that initial statement (the above paragraph) ... I've made a point over the past few years to give the surveillance guys something provocative to surveil ... which is to say, when in those environs that I highly suspect audio surveillance to be taking place ... I go off on wild and seriously demented verbal tangents about all sorts of sick shit. I mean I really go for it. It's horrific and it even bothers me a bit to vocalize such content but I keep in mind the fact that I have a point to make and so I make it. Anything at the extreme end of Violence(tm), Sex(tm), Necrophilia(tm) and in relation to Children(tm), Babies(tm) and more ... is what I heartily go at verbally. Really, I've considered becoming a horror writer as I've personally been impressed (horrified) at my own imagination the past few weeks. Shoosh! Really bad shit (really fun and funny at the same time because though I can't prove it yet, I happen to know they are getting it).
And trust me, I will certainly not replicate any of it here because it is the penultimate of vile; but, suffice it to say, I engage in this sort of "taunting" because hey, it's just me in the privacy of my own mind or in the privacy of my own home or workplace with no other human witnesses present (other than the whackos) and there is certainly no will or meaning behind the rants and so ... no harm done.
Something from the very fine essays by one Allen L. Barker definitely comes to mind here:
"By the way, you can taunt them all you want in your head, since it is only you and the Nazis there. Likewise, curse the pigs that bug your house (or workplace!) all you want. They just do not seem to understand that if they reveal anything they know about your private mentation or private conversations in your home they cannot call you crazy. It would be like entering the FBI tapes of Martin Luther King saying the FBI was out to get him as evidence that he was paranoid." --Allen L. Barker, "Mental Firewalls"
Now, in light of all of the above, consider this...
What if circumstances related to myself, which might warrant the need for legally approved surveillance, were suddenly manufactured in my life by the whackos behind this long winded debacle? I mean, specifically, circumstances that have nothing to do with the facts made known in jbhfile.com, but rather, around something else completely unrelated ... like my recently being introduced to this dude who is growing hydroponic marijuana (and who my brother, a daily smoker, is becoming closer and closer with). What about that, hmmm? I mean, it's a decent hypothetical! (Besides, the dude has already made two, er, "deliveries" to my brother at my family company ... and so, ...)
Well then, the whackos could confront me on any of the violent and depraved and sick nonsense that I've been "shouting to the air" in those areas I feel I might be surveilled, while also being able to claim that the surveillance itself had nothing to do with the "nonsense" I've been talking regarding an investigation of myself but instead had to do with mine and my brothers association with this pot growing dude; for instance, they might say:
"And in the course of analyzing that surveillance data, Mr. Harris, we became very concerned about some of your comments that we happened to catch on tape and it's been recommended you discuss such with a Specialist(tm)."
It's a decent hypothetical, a bit granular, but it should still be stated publicly.
Otherwise?
Otherwise, all is well.
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this post is intended to be supplemental to the facts made public in my main website, http://www.jbhfile.com/; it probably will not make much sense to you if you have not already made yourself aware of the legal and personal efforts discussed in that site. please see http://www.jbhfile.com/ for a necessary introduction into why this blog exists. or, if you just like reading weird stuff, then don't. and, enjoy.
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jbh.
this post is intended to be supplemental to the facts made public in my main website, http://www.jbhfile.com/; it probably will not make much sense to you if you have not already made yourself aware of the legal and personal efforts discussed in that site. please see http://www.jbhfile.com/ for a necessary introduction into why this blog exists. or, if you just like reading weird stuff, then don't. and, enjoy.
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jbh.
